The Secret Sushi Bar Lingered in the Distance...
by Xander
Summary: Just a random example of how weird my cousin and I can get when we really try...Read it though! It's harmess insanity! I swear! It has Harry wandering through the desert and Ron in a pink frilly tutu! Must be read to be believed! Co-written by Miss Egypt.


The Secret Sushi Bar lingered in the distance. Harry was very unsure of whether to taste it or not. All of a sudden he fell to his knees, croaking desperately.   
  
He realized that the poison starfish he had eaten there last week was prepared wrong and the poison was taking effect. He rolled around in the dirt and sand trying to cry out for help.   
  
Harry was in the desert, and it had turned out that the Sushi Bar deal was a total mirage. He saw another mirage float merrily past him and he realized it was his best friend Ron, only he was wearing a tutu, skipping along happily.  
  
Harry shook his head and wondered aloud, "What the??" He looked in another direction and saw another mirage. This time he saw a large muscular man with funny sunglasses and a feathery robot with a mustache. He couldn't believe what he was seeing. The desert was getting too weird for him. Things started getting gray and hazy right before he passed out.  
  
Harry was sure he'd never make it alive, and why wouldn't anyone help him? The total question was how did he end up in this barren desert anyway? Once Harry awoke with a mouth full of sand he noticed that the clouds began taking on strange shapes; the nearest one began to resemble a chainsaw. The other one became a parakeet, another a pigeon and so on.   
  
Harry was confused when he saw a chicken shaped cloud appear over the horizon. He became almost entranced by it. He watched it closely. Suddenly, a large tentacle came out of the sand and started to pull Harry under the sand. He tried to scream for help, but his mouth was too dry. He looked all around. None of the mirages would help him. In fact they were all oblivious to what was happening. The feather boa guy was staring at his feathery robot and Ron-Tutu was practicing his twirls. And the sushi bar looked like it was having a party. Harry shrugged and disappeared under the sand.  
  
He woke suddenly with a cold sweat beading all over on his forehead, and his whole body was trembling. He seemed to be having seizures and other unknown, involuntary spasms. He awoke at his school of wizardry. He glanced over a Ron, who was sleeping in another bunk, and not twirling in the desert. He was normally tutu free, and this was a relief to Harry.   
  
He slowly dozed off back to sleep. He slept a dreamless, light sleep for the rest of the night that is until Ron started to snore. Harry woke up and looked over to Ron. He shook his head and became increasingly frustrated. He finally blew up and walked over to Ron. "Ron, you may be my friend, but I have to do this!" Harry picked up Ron's dirty socks and pressed them firmly against Ron's nose. The plan backfired.   
"Harry, your feet odor is really offensive," said Ron in his sleep. Harry went back to his bed and pulled out some duct tape. He taped the socks to Ron's nose and went back to bed.  
  
In his sleep Ron tore off the socks and then woke with a terrible yelp. He rubbed the sore area on his nose and glanced at Harry, who was sitting upright in his bunk. He spied the duct tape and Harry's weak smile. Harry had only one explanation. "I've had a hard night sleeping, okay. I had a horrible desert dream. You were there doing pirouettes in a frilly pink tutu. I almost died in the sand when I woke up, and you were snoring too loudly for me to catch my sleep!" Harry told a very angry Ron.  
  
Ron smiled slyly. "You mean this tutu?" asked Ron. He held up a frilly pink tutu, just like the one from the dream.  
"Ahh!" screamed Harry as he bolted upright in bed. It had been another dream. How odd.  
  
Ron was still trying to snore through the duct tape on his mouth. Harry thought he should really see someone about these dream sequences. Ron coughed and sat upright as well, and as he jerked the tape off, Ron stifled a screech. His old socks were taped to his mouth, and it was very painful to remove, but they were removed. Harry explained it all over again, like he had in the second dream. Ron nodded without showing too much anger. "But now my nose and mouth are throbbing, and I can't sleep either," whined Ron.  
  
Harry moved over to the Ron's bunk and sat down. "Well, what know?" asked Harry.  
"Kitchen Raid!" exclaimed Ron. Both Harry and Ron ran down to the kitchen and started pulling out all kinds of junk food. Harry got a spoon and started eating peanut butter out of a large white tub. Ron found a large box of Fruit Roll-upsÔ and opened it. He peeled a couple open and crumpled them into a large ball that he shoved into his mouth and attempted to chew. "This was a great idea," said Ron as red colored spit drooled from his mouth.  
  
"Ooh!" shouted Harry happily as he pulled a box full of Every Flavor Beans. He liked these, even though some were not very pleasing. When they said every flavor, they meant every flavor. Harry but a dark green jelly bean into his mouth and began to chew. As a few seconds ticked away, his face started to cringe. "These are revolting!" howled Harry. "I just ate a toad flavored bean!"  
  
"They should ban those," said Ron angrily. "They sound good, but like they say, every flavor means every flavor." Ron turned around and stopped in his tracks. A tall, strict teacher stood behind him.  
  
"Here, have this nice butterscotch jelly bean," offered Harry.  
  
"Why thank you." The teacher popped the jelly bean into his mouth. "Eww--stomach acid."  
  
"Now we boogie?" asked Ron.  
  
"Yes," replied Harry as they both ran from the kitchen.  
  
They hurtled into their bunks without another word.   
  
The End  



End file.
